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  • Writer's pictureAbs

Major 2019 Lessons


"2019 basically said 'but did you die tho?'"

- No, but almost sis!


This year has been beautiful, trying, and a real eye opener and I wouldn't change anything if I could. Every moment and experience taught me incredible lessons that I look back on now and I'm just grateful.

My OPT ended, I spent my entire summer in Ghana, My sister got married, I'm back in school for my Bachelors, I feel at home in my new Christian community, joined the wig gang (still not a huge fan lol), just to name a few experiences.

I also turned 25 and decided to call it my year of Awakening - My Awakening - words are powerful, is all I can say right now (lol) because five months in and I'm simply blown away by what it really means to be Awakened especially in today's climate. I know there's so much more coming and I'm both anxious and excited.

There are a few MAJOR things that I've learned this year through experiences and advice from family and friends that I wish to share with you today. Y'all may already know these things so this would be a reminder for some of you. These lessons have really changed my perspective on life and self, and allowing myself to intentionally choose to learn and grow this year is the tip of the iceberg on this Awakening journey.

1. There are no Limits.

Visual Art has been my love for the longest time if not my whole life; I chose fashion after an experience back in 2007 when I was introduced to the process of creating costumes from a theme. There are so many aspects of fashion though, styling, designing, photography, etc. and I knew I wanted to be a designer because that's what I was exposed to and that was my focus...I still want that of course but I've also come to love styling and photography, so I express that through blogging. I don't know if anyone else experiences this but this year especially I felt like I had put myself in a box, limiting myself to aspiring to be a fashion designer alone. After hours of journaling, friends + wine therapy, I realized I don't have to be just that. I'm in my 20's and it's really the best time to explore as many things as possible. So I'm focusing on that in the coming year, explore and go all out in every exploration - ALL OUT - because what's the point in doing a thing if you're not going to do it well?

2. Sustainability

Reading "fashionopolis" really opened my eyes, mind and heart to the industry I'm in and how I can do better for it. The process of creating clothes shouldn't cost someone's life, it shouldn't destroy someone's future or cause create unclean water/food for anyone. It's clothes. A friend of mine recently said "we're not trying to solve cancer here, we're making clothes, it's not that deep" and I know he wasn't disrespecting the industry but throwing light to a beautiful craft that's turning into a villain to the environment.

I came back from Ghana and didn't shop or go into a clothing store after reading about sustainability in the fashion industry. I needed jeans and bought my first pair of carefully made jeans from Everlane knowing what went into producing them, no lives lost, no waste of water or contaminating it. They're comfortable and make my butt look great so that was a huge plus lol

I will do a separate post on the little I've come to learn about sustainable fashion and how to buy and create more consciously.

3. Self Respect

Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that doesn't serve you - and I will add enough to serve others. I know the theme for so many people is 'do you' but do you only if someway somehow others are encouraged or blessed to 'do them.' I love people who are not in the same career field that I am, who really have me wanting to work on my talent and be a better person simply because they're killing it in theirs. I don't want to be them, but I aspire to work as hard, to touch lives the way they do in their fields. That to me is self respect...focusing on what serves you to serve others because you have to remember you can't give what you don't have. Let's just say this one had me doing things way out of my comfort zone but in the best way possible.

4. Don't Wait on People

I love doing things in a group lmao! I know I'm not alone in this. Actually when I watched Cheetah girls as a kid I wanted to be part of a girl group...I actually kind of was before we moved to Malawi, haha, Elise, Ewurabena and I really had a whole group and we'd meet for practice and all that lol. sigh. memories.

Anyway, yes, I love doing things with other people mainly because it's more comfortable and easier to be less self conscious, but I don't always have people around who want to do what I want to do and this year I've learned to do it anyway. #BLOOMGIRL

Yes, I've had a few great losses in 2019, in the form of opportunities and people, but one thing I've learned very recently is that because of who I serve, everything works together for my good. God's plan is bigger than my human mind could ever understand, and if there's a loss, He's either about to resurrect it or present me with something better - there's always a lesson for me to be a higher, much better version of myself in all entirety and that's liberating.

Abs x

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